Hiding in Plain Sight
by MyHeartDrawsADream
Summary: Amanda captures Sean and uses him as the next victim of her mind games, erasing his memory of everything and giving him a new life as Griffin Conner. Sort of a Nikita/Remedy crossover. Will probably have Salex in future chapters.
1. Prologue

**A/N This story randomly came to my mind after watching episode 1x06 of Remedy and since I haven't posted anything in a while, I decided to just go forth and write/post it. Also thanks to Tara (Wootar16) for helping me come up with the amazing title as well as the last line of this chapter! Hopefully this fic doesn't disappoint. **

Prologue

An unconscious Sean was being dragged into a dimly lit room, and not so gently placed into the dentist's chair in the corner by two guards. Moments later, Amanda's familiar footsteps could be heard from the end of the hall as her heels clicked against the metal ground. The large wooden double doors of the old hospital opened and she stepped inside, making her way over to him. She stopped in front of the chair he was in, and pulled the tray of medical tools towards her.

"Thank you boys. You're free to go. Make sure you send Anne in here on your way out," she said, keeping her eyes on Sean, her voice remaining at an even level. The two guards scurried out of the room without a word.

Less than a minute later, Anne strolled in quietly. She made her way over to them, and observed carefully as Amanda made sure to tighten all of the restraints around Sean's arms, legs, and forehead.

"Nervous?" Anne wondered. She had briefly watched Amanda play her famous mind games on Alex a few months ago, but she had never seen her do this particular procedure. She assumed it was a lot different to completely rid someone of their memories than it was to just mix some things around.

Amanda shot her a look, offended that anyone would think such a thing about her. "I don't get nervous," she stated, cleaning off all of her tools. "You can never be too careful," she added, her voice even.

"And you're sure he's not going to remember _anything_?" She asked, emphasizing the last word and motioning over to the silver watch still clasped around his wrist.

Amanda growled and quickly removed the watch, tossing it on to an empty tray next to her. "Alex will be the **first** thing he forgets. I've done this procedure enough times to know exactly how it works."

"But what if for some reason it doesn't?" She didn't quite understand why, but somewhere in the back of her mind she almost wished Amanda wouldn't do this to him.

"Then we have to kill him and call off the plan," she stated as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. "Why are you questioning my abilities all of a sudden?"

Anne kept her face neutral, expecting that answer. She didn't know what to say to Amanda's question though. She thought for a moment, and as Amanda was pulling the large needle closer to Sean's face, she said, "I'm just curious, that's all. Amanda inserted the needle through Sean's nose and began to work on him, motioning for Anne to be quiet.

* * *

"He should be waking up any minute now," Amanda said, looking up at the clock. "I want to make sure there is absolutely no way for this to go wrong, so I'd like you to go through the story one more time."

Anne sighed. She had had to repeat this story to her so many times, she was starting to get a little bit annoyed. "When he wakes up, he's going to think his name is Griffin Conner, a 29 year old med school drop out that failed his entire family and abandoned them for the past two years. He has two sisters, Melissa, a top surgeon, and myself, Sandy Conner, a nurse who only wants the best for her little brother. Our father, Allen Conner is the Acting Chief of Staff at Bethune General Hospital, where we all work."

"Wonderful," Amanda says as she scribbles something down on her clip board. "And what is the estimated time of Griffin's arrival?"

"If everything goes according to plan, in about a month he should be landing himself in the emergency room at Bethune General due to a bar fight," Anne stated simply, the words fresh in her mind, having rehearsed the story so many times.

"And Sean?" She asks.

"Sean Pierce doesn't exist. Anyone who ever knew him thinks he's dead, and I intend to keep it that way." Her voice was almost robotic.

"Perfect!" Amanda smiles. "I have to say, I'm proud of you Sandy. Anne no longer needs to exist either. You're free to live your life however you wish, as long as it doesn't compromise our agreement."

"Understood," she nodded.

"Now, I hate to do this, but you need to go back to Toronto. You can't be here when he wakes up," Amanda stated, motioning for the blonde to leave. She did as she was told, and Amanda made her way into Sean's room.

* * *

"Welcome back," Amanda said as Sean finally opened his eyes, looking around. He looked up at her, confused. "I'm Doctor Collins. I'll be on your case while you're here."

"Where exactly is here?" He asked, his voice groggy.

"St. Helen's Hospital in New York. Someone found you unconscious on the street and brought you in. You woke up once, but you just passed out again a few minutes later," Amanda said, casually.

He squinted his eyes, looking around the bright white room once again before bringing his eyes back to Amanda. "I don't... I don't remember..." He stated, dazed.

Amanda nodded, knowingly. She had obviously rehearsed this many times. "That's not uncommon. When they brought you in, you seemed to have been unconscious for hours, possibly days. How you managed to stay alive was a miracle. A little amnesia is nothing to fear at this point."

"Okay," he nodded, not knowing what else to say. "My head really hurts," he stated.

"I assume it would from all those drugs."

He looked at her again, confusion clouding his eyes. "Drugs?"

Amanda sighed and pulled up a chair next to his bed. "You don't remember any drugs?" He shook his head slowly. She picked up a notepad and a pen, and began scribbling things down. "Can you tell me your name, please?"

"Umm..." He looked up at her, suddenly feeling scared. He shook his head. "I-"

Amanda stopped him. She didn't want him thinking too much. "It's okay. What about your date of birth?" He shook his head again. Amanda let out a loud sigh. She needed to know one more thing before she could be certain that the procedure had been a success. "Alright, then can you tell me what the last thing you remember is?"

"Umm..." He closed his eyes and thought for a minute. Amanda was getting a little uneasy. She was about to urge him to speak again when he finally did. "A beach."

"What about the beach?" She asked, smiling inwardly.

He wracked his brain for better details. "I was with some friends... I think they were my friends. The water was really blue, and the sun was starting to set over the Andaman Sea. I think...? Thailand..." He trailed off, uncertain, closing his eyes. He opened them again, the next part of the story coming back to his mind. "Then the cops showed up, out of nowhere. We agreed to meet up at the docks when they were gone, but three of them got arrested. The rest of us left. Then I remember getting back to my apartment, and just... Going to sleep... I guess."

"That's all? Nothing else?" He just shook his head again. "So you have no idea how you got from Thailand to New York before falling unconscious?" He shrugged his shoulders, and Amanda scribbled away at her notebook once again. "Well then I guess we're lucky you had your wallet with you."

"My wallet?" He asked, giving her a puzzled look.

"You said you don't remember your name. Lucky for you, we do." She picked up a small black wallet and pulled out a card, handing it to him. "Griffin Conner. Date of birth: July 6th 1985 in Toronto, Canada." He took the card from her outstretched hand and eyed it carefully.

"Canada?"

"That's what your identification states," Amanda replied. "Does that not seem right?"

"I guess it's right," he said, unsure as he looked over the information.

Amanda smiled at him. "I'm going to let you rest for a while, and I'll come check on you in a bit."

"Alright," he said, and she finally left him alone. "Canada?" He repeated under his breath when he was sure she couldn't hear him anymore. Something didn't seem right about that, but that's all he had to go on for now.

**A/N Let me know what you think by sending me a review!**


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: Gasp! Did I actually update a fic?! Who would have thought! So anyway, here's the next little instalment to this story, for anyone who's interested. Read away, little monkeys! And leave me a review afterwards to let me know what you thought!** Now go read the chapter!****

Chapter 1:

Sean sat up in his hospital bed, trying to shake away the headache he had been having since he had woken up. He picked up the simple black wallet the Dr. Collins had left for him, flipping through the pockets. All that was in it was the drivers license that she had shown him earlier, a twenty dollar bill, and a small photograph sticking out of a pocket that he almost didn't notice.

He pulled it out and examined it carefully. It was a picture of an older bald man, and two women, maybe a few years older then him. "Who…?" He mumbled to himself. He felt a little guilty for not knowing who they were. He figured that since the picture was in his wallet, they were probably an important part of his life.

Hoping to find any more clues about who he might be, he searched through every pocket one more time, with no luck.

"Argh!" He screamed in frustration, throwing the little black piece of leather across the room, annoyed by his brain. He couldn't remember a thing. It felt like, before he had woken up a few hours ago, he didn't even exist. Almost like he was just born. Why couldn't he remember anything?

—

Meanwhile, Amanda was sitting at her desk, flipping through her own pile of pictures, letters, and other miscellaneous items that she felt might threaten her plan and create a window into Sean's past, tossing each of them one by one into a fireplace.

She stopped briefly at a picture of Sean and Alex that she had found in his room the day she had taken his body from the Division morgue. She examined the photo, taking in the smiling faces of the once-happy couple. Sean's arm was extended to take the photo, while Alex had her arms wrapped around his waist.

"Alex," she shook her head in disappointment, still eyeing the picture. "It really is tragic what had to happen. If only you had listened in the beginning, none of this would have happened. The two of you could have walked out of this together, unharmed." They had looked so happy, Amanda thought to herself before throwing the photograph into the fire and watching Alex's face burn until it disappeared.

Suddenly, Amanda heard a loud thud coming from Sean's room. She rushed in to see what was going on, just as Sean picked up the vase sitting next to his bed, ready to smash it against the wall. She ran over to catch him, taking the vase out of his hands before he had the chance to break it. He tried to reach for something else to throw, failing as Amanda blocked his path. She quickly put something down on the table before turning her attention back to him.

"Mr. Conner!" She yelled, her tone harsh as two other doctors ran into the room to hold Sean down. "I'm going to need you to calm down before you hurt yourself!"

He struggled to get out of their grip, letting out a frustrated scream when he realized they were too strong for him. "Why?!" He shouted, his voice demanding. "Why don't I remember anything?! Tell me! You have to know why this is happening! You're a doctor!"

Amanda took a deep breath and sat down next to him. "Look, Mr. Conner. I'm not sure what to tell you. Every scan and test that we have done so far all came back completely normal. There's no sign of any brain trauma, and thus, no evidence to support that you really do not remember anything."

"Are you accusing me of lying now?" He asked, incredulous.

Amanda was calm as she continued to speak. "I'm not accusing you of anything sir. I am simply stating a fact that was shown through extensive tests. Your case is a mystery. I've been practicing medicine for a long time, and I have never seen anything like it before."

"What the hell do you know?" He scoffed, still fighting to get away from the two doctors holding his arms down. "You can't feel this insane headache that I've had since this morning, and that gets worse every time I try to think! I know what I'm talking about!" He yelled.

Amanda sighed, and picked up the syringe from the table, having prepared it ahead of time in case they encountered a situation like this.

Sean stared at her with wide eyes. "What the hell is that?"

"You need to get some rest," was all she said before she injected the clear fluid into his arm. "Right now, I would highly recommend that you stay at the hospital with us for a few days so that I can keep an eye on you. After that, I would suggest that you go back to Toronto and get settled back into your apartment. Perhaps the familiarity of it will help jog your memory a little. Maybe even get a job, unless of course you want to land yourself in another sticky situation."

Sean nodded, calming down as the sedative Amanda had given him had quickly taken effect. The doctors finally released his arms, and Amanda helped him lie back down on the bed as his eyes closed.

Within seconds, he was asleep. Amanda let out a sigh of relief, and quietly urged everyone out of the room, following behind. "So stubborn," she breathed as she locked his door.

—

He was walking down a dimly lit hallway when his phone started to ring in his pocket. He pulled it out and answered it with a simple, "Hello." _Hello? That doesn__'__t sound right._ He shook the thought away as the person on the other line started to speak.

"I made it," was all he heard, noting that the voice belonged to a woman. _Who is this person? What the hell does she mean she made it? What did she make? Cake? I could really go for some cake right now. Man, I__'__m starving! Maybe if I__'__m nice enough she__'__ll share with me. Wait, focus, dumbass! Ask her who she__'__s calling._

He opened his mouth to speak, the words flowing as if it were a recording. "How'd it go?" _What? How did what go? Where did that even come from? That__'__s not what I said!_

"It went," the voice said. _Huh? Are we speaking in code? What the hell is going on?_

"You alright?" He asked. _Why wouldn__'__t she be alright? She sounds perfectly fine. Who__'__s the moron controlling my words?_

"Yeah, I just— didn't expect it to be like this."

"How's that?" _Finally. Ask the real questions._

There was silence for a moment before she spoke again. "Empty." _What the fuck? Does this girl not know how to answer a question? Is she challenged?_

"Just be careful out there." He made his way into a room, annoyed that his mouth continued to have a mind of its own. _Well, apparently I__'__m challenged too. Why is nobody making any sense? _He looked around, taking in his surroundings. _Wait, what the hell is this room? Why am I in here? _"If you get into trouble, you know you don't have to do this alone." _What is she doing? Is she part of the mafia or something? _

"What, are you gonna fly out here?" She countered. _What? Fly where? _

"Yeah, I wish I could," he said, spotting a computer and making his way over to it. _Okay, I__'__m clearly whipped. I wonder if she__'__s hot. She sounds hot. _"But listen, if you do get into a bind, you call someone. Doesn't matter who it is, you call someone to get you out of there." _I really don__'__t like where this is going. Is she really in danger? This is all a joke, right? Really funny! Ha ha! You can cut the crap now!_

"Will do," she told him.

"I'll be seeing you," he said before hanging up and putting his phone back in his pocket. _Alright, that definitely takes the cake for being the weirdest thing ever. Speaking of cake, I still really want some. _He eyed the computer screen, which seemed to be a satellite map with a blinking red square that moved ever so slightly. _What the hell? What is this thing?_

He was about to click the little red square, when his eyes flew open. "Ugh," he groaned, blinking. The sunlight seeping through the windows burned his eyes, as he suddenly remembered that he was still in the hospital. "It was just a dream?" He wondered out loud, his voice groggy as he took in his surroundings. _That explains it. _"Whatever." He buried his face into the uncomfortable pillow and closed his eyes again.

—

The next few days passed by slowly, with Sean getting increasingly irritable and impatient. He just wanted to get out of there already. He didn't know what, but something about Dr. Collins really bothered him. He quickly came to the conclusion that he didn't trust her.

It took nearly two weeks before Amanda was finally confident that everything was in place and that Toronto would be safe for Griffin. That morning, she strolled into his room, putting on her best fake smile. "Good morning, Mr. Conner," she said, her voice making him roll his eyes in annoyance. What was so good about it? At his reaction, she spoke again. "I have some good news for you. I'd say you're finally ready to leave and get back to your old life."

He raised his head to look at her. "Wait, really?" He asked, getting his hopes up.

"Really," she nodded. "There isn't much left that I can do for you here." She handed him a pile of clothes, with a business card on top.

"What's this?" He asked, eyeing the card cautiously.

"You've been through a lot these past two weeks, so I figured I would try to help you out as best as I can. I made some phone calls, and found you this job. It's not much, but it should be enough to pay your bills and get you back on the right track. It's also fairly close to your apartment, and they said they were willing to train you. All you need to do is show up at that address on Monday afternoon for your first shift."

He finally picked up the card, reading it over. "Bartending? Are you sure this is such a good idea? I mean, with the drugs and all…" He trailed off. Dr. Collins had seemed pretty confident that drugs were the cause of his hospitalization, and even went so far as to give him medication that she insisted would help ease the drug cravings. In all honesty, he just seemed to want it even more since then.

"You've been doing quite well with your rehabilitation, since we started it. I am confident that you are going to manage this just fine." He just nodded, not quite convinced, as she left the room to let him get dressed.

Two hours later, he was sitting in his seat, impatiently waiting for his plane to take off. He hoped that once he was back in Toronto, he would finally start to remember who he was. He was getting really sick of not knowing anything. He fidgeted with the picture of the older man and two women while waiting. Maybe he would finally remember who they were.

**A/N: So? How was it? What'd you think of that little inner monologue with Sean/Griffin? And Amanda's creepy antics! She's so much fun to write! **


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: I've gotten so many ideas for this story in the past few days so luckily I've been getting pretty far in writing it. Okay, so heads up, so because this chapter and the ones after are of Sean actually living his new life as Griffin rather than being in a hospital room, from now on I'm going to be referring to him as Griffin for the next little while. Hopefully that doesn't get confusing for anyone. **

**Disclaimer: I forgot to make these for the other chapters but I feel like I really should add it to this one because I don't own the Remington's Men of Steel strip club that is briefly mentioned in the chapter and don't want to get sued for illegal usage. And with that, I also obviously don't own Nikita OR Remedy, or any of it's characters, and I am not making any profits with this fanfic. That is all. **

Chapter 2

Griffin had spent his first days in Toronto cooped up in his apartment as he looked through photo album after photo album which, much to his liking, were all conveniently collecting dust on a shelf. A part of him felt it was odd that most of the photographs came with little captions on the back, but he wasn't about to question the only thing that would be able to help him. Things like Melissa Graduating Med School, Sandy's 21st Birthday, and Family Vacation, all helped him piece together little bits of the life he had no recollection of. There was even an entire album dedicated solely to what a disappointment he was to his entire family, along with printed screenshots of emails exchanged between them in the last two years. There were only two. He threw those in the garbage.

But the information all seemed a little too obvious. Even though he managed to figure out most of his past from the hundreds of pictures and stories, he still couldn't actually **remember** any of the time he supposedly spent with his family. Somehow, he could just feel that something wasn't right with the story. It just didn't add up. And whatever he did remember, mostly time spent alone and in some sort of prison, all felt more like dreams than they did memories.

Monday morning had rolled around faster than he would have liked. For a moment he contemplated skipping his first day of work and finding something else, but then pushed that thought aside and sauntered over to the location that Dr. Collins had given him. He made his way through the large doors of the club and looked around at the nearly empty room. His eyes had just landed on a stage across from him when a blonde man at least twice his size blocked his view. _Great. I'm going to work at a freaking strip club. _

Griffin looked up to see the man towering over him with a smirk.

"Hey," the man spoke calmly. "Listen, uh, we don't actually open for another hour, if you wanna come back later…"

"Oh, no. Um. I'm…" Griffin started before the man interrupted him.

"Wait, no. Let me guess. You're lost, eh? You don't look like you're from around here."

"No, I…" _Wait, what's that supposed to mean? Do I look foreign?_

"Alright, uhh, lookin' for someone?" He interrupted again.

Griffin sighed in frustration. "No! Can you just let me finish?" He snapped, making the man nod. "Thank you! Geez. I'm here for work."

The man arched a brow in amusement and gave Griffin a quick once-over, making him shift uncomfortably. "Oh. I'm sorry but this, uh… This isn't a gay club. We only hire female strippers here. You're gonna wanna try Remington's for that. It's just about three blocks that way," he said, pointing to his left.

"I'm not gay!" He said, defensively. _I'm not, am I? No. No I'm definitely not gay. I would know if I was gay. _At the confused look on the man's face, Griffin added, "Not that - Not that there's anything wrong with being gay. It's just - I'm not… Gay." He rambled on before realizing he wasn't getting anywhere. "Listen, could I just speak to whoever's in charge?"

"Sure, follow me," he said, leading Griffin down a hallway. "Uh, I don't think I got your name…? For my boss, I mean."

"Griffin. Griffin Conner," he said. It was the first time he had said his name out loud since waking up in the hospital. It almost sounded strange.

The man laughed and looked back at Griffin. "Are you sure?"

"What?" he asked, caught off guard.

"Your name. You don't sound so sure."

"Oh." Was he sure? Everything around him told him that, so he figured there was no reason for him to doubt it. _Then why does it sound so damn weird?_ "Yeah, I'm sure," he added as an afterthought.

"Alright, cool. I'm Chase by the way," the man said as they turned a corner and stopped in front of a door. "Hey Boss! Some guy named Griffin Conner is here to see you!"

Suddenly the door swung open, revealing yet another man, this one slightly chubbier. "Ahh yes, Griffin Conner. It's a pleasure to meet you, young man," he said, extending his hand. Griffin shook it with a firm grip, nodding.

"Thank you so much for the opportunity Mr…" He trailed off, unsure of how to finish his sentence.

He laughed. "Just Steve is fine. I don't care much for formalities. Let me show you around."

The two made their way around the club, letting Griffin get familiarized with the place. Steve introduced him to the three people he would be working with by the bar, and then set him up to begin his first shift, just as the door opened revealing the first visitor of the night.

He thought his first day had gone rather well. All of his co-workers seemed nice and welcomed him to their group immediately, helping him out if he didn't know how to do something. They even introduced him to two of the dancers that worked there. One of the girls, Natasha, really seemed to take a liking to him. Not that he was complaining. At the end of his shift, he counted up $30 in tips, and then began his long walk home.

He took a shortcut across an open field to get back to his apartment, absorbed in his thoughts until he swore he could hear a female voice coming from next to him. "That's not what happened!" She said in disbelief. "The neurotoxin was Percy's plan. And those three dead agents…" She kept talking, but Griffin had stopped listening when realization hit him. That voice. It was the same voice as the woman on the phone from that dream he had way back in the hospital. He was sure it wasn't a dream this time. _It's her._ He looked down to see a woman wearing a jean jacket with dark brown hair that went down below her shoulders, just casually walking next to him as if they were old friends. He could still hear her voice, but couldn't make out her words as his curiosity got the best of him. He couldn't stop thinking about her ever since he had the dream, and he needed to know what she looked like. He stopped and turned to her, hoping to get a glimpse of the mystery woman's face, but failing. "Why are you working for them anyways?" He heard her ask when his head started to spin, and he stumbled a little.

Just then, his vision completely blurred and a giant wave of pain shot through his head. "Aahh!" He shouted, letting himself fall to his knees as he closed his eyes and cradled his head, waiting for the pain to go away. He could faintly hear something that sounded like gunshots, before something hard hit his chest and knocked him down onto the cold, wet grass.

When he opened his eyes, he could see the woman's dark hair in front of him again, her face still hidden. He realized she had knocked him down and was now on top of him, aiming a gun somewhere behind his head. Off in the distance, he could see another man heading towards them, his own gun pointed right at the mystery woman's head. "Hey," he whispered, nudging her in the hopes to bring her attention to the gunman behind her. If she had heard him, then he was pretty sure she ignored him as she fired a bullet and he heard a body fall to the ground. The man behind her was getting closer by the second and Griffin closed his eyes, partially because he really didn't want to see this woman's brain explode right in front of him while he was completely helpless, and partially because the intense pain in his head had returned.

When the headache began to subside again, he slowly opened his eyes, mentally preparing himself for the sight of blood and dead bodies all around him. Instead, he was shocked when he saw a completely empty field of grass. He pushed himself back up to a standing position, listening to the crickets chirping and a few cars in the distance driving by.

He looked all around trying to find the woman that was just there seconds ago, but with absolutely no luck. It was almost like nothing had happened. "Hello?" He called out, wandering around the empty field. "Hello?" He said again, a little louder. He needed to find her.

Suddenly he spotted a dark figure in the distance. "Hey!" He shouted as he cautiously made his way towards it. "Who are you?" He ran to catch up to the body that he now realized was heading away from him. "Hey," he said again, placing a hand on her shoulder once he caught up, urging her to turn around so he could see her face. "Natasha?" He asked in shock when she did. She pulled out her headphones and looked at him.

"Griffin! Hi!" She said enthusiastically.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, confusion clouding his eyes. Did she see the gun fight too? _Maybe she could help me find her._

She laughed and said, "The same thing you're doing." However, his confusion only grew, and at the look on his face she added, "Going home from work…? Are you alright?"

"Right. Home. Yeah, I'm fine. I think. Didn't you see that?" He asked, motioning to where he had just come from.

Now it was her turn to be confused. "See what?"

"Th-there. The guns. A-and the girl. I-I-I think she got shot…" He stammered, scanning the area once more before looking back at Natasha, who was eyeing him suspiciously. _Maybe she wasn't here long enough. Dude, do you realize how ridiculous you sound right now? _

"Guns. Sure. I think you need to go home and get some sleep, Griffin."

He scoffed. _I know what I saw. _"You really didn't see that? You didn't even hear it? Are you sure? Come on, think really hard," he almost begged. _I'm not crazy._

She gently placed her hand on his shoulder, leading him back towards the street as she spoke. "No. I'm sure I didn't see or hear anything. I think you might be imagining things."

"I swear it happened! It wasn't even ten minutes ago!" He tried again.

Natasha shook her head, clueless. "Nope. I definitely didn't hear anything. Besides, don't you think there would be cops here by now if there really were gunshots being fired out here?"

He thought it over for another minute before nodding. _Maybe she's right. _They walked the rest of the way in silence, Griffin completely absorbed in his thoughts.

_It felt so real…_

**A/N: So, what did you think? What was your favorite part? What did you think of Chase? Should I bring him back in another chapter? Did that flashback seem realistic enough? Would you prefer if I have a flashback/dream in every chapter or would that be too much? And last question, do you like the inner monologues style or should I change/stop that?**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N Sorry for the lack of update on this thing, but I've been super busy with school and been on a serious writers block that I just didn't have the time or motivation to write this. I spent like 2 months writing little paragraphs every once in a while until I finally finished it, and then realized how horrible it was so the editing process took way longer then it normally would. The good stuff is coming REALLY soon, so bear with me. (Maybe even the next chapter ;))**

Chapter 3

Griffin had just gotten out of the shower when he heard a quiet knock at his door. He looked up at the clock on the wall, furrowing his brows when he saw the time: 6:15pm. He still had 15 minutes left to get ready. Sighing, he quickly threw on a pair of dark jeans and made his way to the door, swinging it open to reveal his date.

"Natasha! Hey! You're early."

Natasha let out a nervous laugh. "Yeah, I know. I didn't realize how fast I would get here. I'm so sorry… Should I, um, should I just come back at 6:30?"

She was just about to turn around and leave when Griffin stopped her. "No, no it's perfectly fine. Come on in." He opened the door wider, letting her know it was okay to enter.

"Are you sure?" She asked, not wanting to come off too strong.

"Absolutely. You just caught me off guard for a minute, that's all," he said with a reassuring smile. She finally stepped inside, and Griffin led her to the couch, letting the door close behind them. "I'm just gonna finish getting dressed, and then we can head out."

"Sounds good," she said, leaning back on his couch as he made his way to the bathroom.

He ran a towel through his wet hair, applied some hair gel and effortlessly styled it the way he usually did before leaving the bathroom and going to his closet. "Casual or formal?" He muttered to himself, looking through all of the different shirts he had hanging up. _She's a stripper, why the hell would you dress formal? _He grabbed a plain black t-shirt and held it up. _Okay, but not that casual. She's way too hot to be seen out with a guy in a freaking t-shirt. Okay, maybe something in between._ He grabbed a light colored button-up shirt, examining it. _That's the one. _He quickly threw it on, fixing it, and checking himself out in the mirror before heading back to the living room.

A few days passed since Griffin started working at the club, and after the incident in the park the other day, him and Natasha quickly started getting closer, which ultimately led to her making a move and asking him out on a date tonight. Obviously he said yes. He was more than excited, but he wasn't exactly sure what to expect while out on a date with a stripper. He had never dated a stripper before. Or at least, he didn't think so. Then again, he couldn't remember anything, so maybe he did. For all he knew, dating strippers could have been an everyday occurrence for him. Or maybe he had a girlfriend. _Unless she was a Russian stripper like the one sitting on your couch right now, who cares?_

He found Natasha in the living room, leaning forward on the couch examining the dozens of pictures that Griffin left sprawled out all over his coffee table. He was still using the pictures to try to figure out who he was before the hospital, but with no luck. He cleared his throat, bringing Natasha's attention back to him.

"Who are these?" She asked in a daze, motioning towards the pile of photos.

Uhh, family… That one's my dad. Those are my two sisters," he said as he pointed out each of the different people. _Supposedly. _"They're all doctors," he added bitterly.

She gave him a small smile. "Are you guys close?"

Griffin scoffed. "Yeah right. God forbid that I have them for support through all of this."

"You mean with the hallucinations?" She asked. He had had another episode in front of her after that first night, which worried her. She was convinced that there was something wrong.

Griffin nodded slowly, looking down at the pictures once more. He still got the odd sense that they were more than just hallucinations, though he didn't know what they could be. But since he already made himself sound crazy once in front of her, he kept his mouth shut, not wanting to make that same mistake again. As long as she thought they were just hallucinations, he would only be half crazy. _Maybe I am crazy…_

She hesitated for a split second before taking out a small plastic bag containing five little pills from her purse, and turning to face him. "Here, these might help calm your mind a bit. Maybe even make those hallucinations disappear completely," she stated, holding the bag of pills out for Griffin to take.

He looked at her, his eyes widening in shock. Dr. Collins' words briefly flickered in his mind, but Natasha's proposition was tempting. Too tempting. _Don't do it! It's not worth it! _He didn't want to end up in the hospital again. Once was more than enough. "And what if it doesn't?" He asked, trying to convince himself more than anything else.

"It might be worth a shot. What's the worst that could happen, right?" She laughed.

_How about ending up in the hospital again? That sounds pretty bad. Don't. Take. It…_

_ Fuck. But what if she__'s right? _He forced out a chuckle."I guess you're right," he said, just staring at the bag, still too afraid to take it from her.

She gave him a reassuring smile. "So take one. Get some sleep tonight for once." He hesitated for a long moment before finally taking the bag from her outstretched hand. He didn't want to seem like a loser by not accepting her offer. _You're a bigger idiot for taking one._

"So, um, I-I guess I'll just take one… Before I go to sleep… tonight," he stuttered, laughing nervously and reaching into the bag to take one out. _Dumbass._

Natasha stopped him, grabbing his wrist. "Griff, just take the whole thing. You're gonna need some later too. It's fine. I've got more at home."

"Oh. Okay. I'll just… Um… I'll leave it here… F-for later," he said, putting them down on the coffee table. _Fine, go ahead and be stupid. Drugs will obviously cure everything. _He felt a sense of guilt rising through him as he thought about using drugs to calm his mind. He knew better, but his judgement was becoming clouded. He kept having those confusing dreams about the girl every night; still unable to catch a glimpse of her face or even find out her name. He was becoming increasingly more frustrated that a figment of his imagination held so much power over him. He was becoming desperate. Maybe the pills would finally stop the dreams. Maybe they would stop _**her**_ from appearing in his subconscious. _Or you're just delusional. What's so special about this girl anyway? _

"Shut up!" He blurted out, forgetting that Natasha was still in the room. She gave him a concerned look. "Sorry," Griffin apologized, shaking off the thoughts and standing up. He reached out a hand to help her up, adding, "Come on, let's head out."

—

Alex stepped out of the bathroom wearing a pair of sweatpants and a shirt that was clearly a few sizes too big on her, with a towel wrapped loosely around her hair. "Ugh, I'm exhausted," she groaned, plopping down on the couch beside Sonya, who was aimlessly flipping through channels.

"I can tell," she chuckled. "The cable sucks here," She complained in her British accent, shutting the TV off to turn towards Alex. "Still no word from Michael?"

"No, nothing. Nikita is making it impossible to find her."

"Leave it to Nikita to complicate everything," Sonya stated, annoyance evident in her voice. Sure, she was her friend, but she was really starting to get sick of her stupid ways. They had enough going on without Nikita running off on them and going into hiding. They needed her there.

The two girls sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes, neither one of them knowing what to say. "Hey, are you alright?" Sonya finally asked, noting the downbeat look that the young brunette had been sporting for the past few weeks. She knew all too well what was wrong with her friend, and how she had been keeping it to herself for too long.

Alex looked up and nodded softly. "Yeah, I'm great," she said, forcefully adding the biggest smile she could muster up. She had been getting used to doing that, not wanting to show weakness. She knew she had to move on.

"Alex, come on. You know you can talk to me—"

"There's nothing to talk about!" Alex snapped. She took a deep breath and quietly added, "I'm fine. Really."

Silence filled the room once again while Sonya contemplated telling Alex her own story. "You know, I've lost people too. My boyfriend Derek, and our son, to be specific," she finally said, causing Alex to look up at her in confusion. "His name was Jake. He was the most adorable little boy ever. A week after his eighth birthday, Derek was driving him home from soccer practice. It got cancelled because of the rain. Anyway, some idiot in a semi was coming towards them out of nowhere, and he hit them, pushing the car off of the bridge and into the water below them. Derek tried getting Jake out of his car seat, but the impact of the accident caused the seatbelt to get lodged, trapping my son in. I lost them both that day. Jake because he couldn't get out of his car seat, and Derek because he stayed behind, still trying to get my dead son to safety." She paused for a moment, exhaling a shaky breath before continuing. "Police found them both a few hours later. They were still in the car, and Derek had my son cradled up in his arms." By the end of her story, Sonya was nearly reduced to tears as she remembered the two people she loved the most.

Alex was at a loss for words. All she could manage was a quiet, "I'm sorry. I had no idea."

"I know exactly what you're going through, Alex. And believe it or not, it helps to talk about it. Maybe you should try it sometime."

This caused Alex to once again go back to her angry facade. It seemed to be the only thing that made the pain go away. "Well maybe I don't want to talk about it. I'm over it. I've moved on. And now I'm gonna go to bed." With that, she stood up, smoothing down her shirt before attempting to walk away. _**His**_ shirt.

Sonya grabbed her arm quickly before she could walk away, stopping her. "If you're so over him, then why do you still sleep in his shirt every night?" She asked pointedly.

Alex scoffed. "That's none of your business."

"Oh come on, Alex! It's been less than a month! You're allowed to grieve. It's perfectly normal."

"And what if I don't want to? This isn't the first time that someone I care about died on me. In case you've forgotten, it seems to be a pretty damn regular occurrence in my life. I know how to deal with it. It's happened before, and it'll happen again. I don't want to talk about it! Just leave me alone!" Alex was nearly shouting. Talking wasn't her favorite thing in the world. She had her own ways of dealing with loss.

"Sean's different, and you know it. You didn't just care about him. You loved him."

"You think you know everything, don't you?"

"Why are you denying it?" Sonya asked, exasperated.

Alex looked down, defeated. "I'm not."

Sonya sighed. "I miss him too, you know. We all do. You obviously miss him more than the rest of us, but you can't just keep it to yourself. You need to let it out."

"Whatever," Alex dismissed, her voice laced with sarcasm. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna go to sleep. I'll see you in the morning." She pulled out of Sonya's grip, and stormed off to her room, not giving her a chance to protest.

She slammed the door to her room, and flung herself down on her bed, burying her face into the mountain of pillows. Sean's simple grey t-shirt clung to her body, and she grasped it tightly in her fist, finally letting the tears escape her eyes, just like she had been doing every night for the past three weeks.

She could almost feel his warm body next to hers, and see that goofy grin of his behind her closed eye lids. She missed him _so damn much_. No one would ever be able to understand her regret. It didn't matter what everyone else said, because she knew it was her own fault that he was gone. There was no one to blame but herself. And she was going to have to live with that for the rest of her life.

—

Hours later, Griffin was finally home after what he considered a very successful night out with Natasha. They had dinner, talked about work and their personal lives, and Griffin finally told her everything that happened to him. Then he walked her home, and she invited him in for a few drinks, and then… well, you know…

After that, he finally left to go home, and now here he was. He sat on the couch, motionless, just staring at the bag of valium that was still sitting on the table from earlier.

_Getting some sleep sounds like it would be nice. And it's supposed to help with amnesia… _

_ But then why didn__'t Dr. Collins prescribe it? _

_ Maybe because she was a sketchy doctor. _

_ Or maybe because you shouldn__'t be taking them! _

_ It might help me remember. _

_ It might kill you!_

_ Wait, why the hell am I arguing with myself?_

_ Because you__'re an idiot!_

_ I__'m taking the fucking pills._

_ No, you__'re not._

_ Yes I am! _

_ No!_

_ Shut the hell up! I__'m taking them and there's nothing you can do about it!_

He didn't know how long it was before he finally moved, reaching for the pills. _What are you doing?!_ He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

_I just told you, I'm — Wait a minute…_ He froze, holding his breath when a thought occurred to him. _That wasn't me._ It was that girls voice again. He looked up, expecting to see the back of her head again, but only found his empty living room. _Great, now even my thoughts are turning into her voice. _With that, he took out a single pill and popped it into his mouth. He desperately wanted her to go away. He thought for a moment and then took a second one, swallowing it quickly before he could change his mind.

"It's gonna help with the pain. It'll also help you relax, okay?" This time, her voice came from beside him. He slowly looked up to see the girl leaning over him, once again obstructing his view of her face. She moved away, making sure her hair stayed in front of her face as she did so. She stood up, pacing around him, not saying a word.

"Why you being all weird?" He asked, without thinking.

"I'm not being weird," she responded, still pacing. It almost seemed like she was trying to avoid him for some reason. _Well, gee. Then how about you don't show up if you don't want to see me?_

"What, you think I don't remember?" Griffin suddenly blurted out, unsure of where that came from. _What was that? You don't remember anything, that's the whole reason you're in this situation! _She didn't say anything. She didn't even move. It was hard to tell if she was even human; she looked more like a statue at that moment. He sighed and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes in the hopes of ignoring the mysterious girl that kept following him around.

_ Well, maybe the drugs are working, and I__'m about to remember everything, ever think about that? Stupid brain._

_You keep telling yourself that, loser. This whole thing is just gonna blow up in your face, and I'll just be here watching, and laughing at you._

_ Yeah, well you__'d only be laughing at yourself._

_ Shit._

_ Oh my god, am I schizophrenic?_

_ I think you__'re just an idiot._

_ I think you need to shut up._

Griffin could feel his head start spinning, the drugs quickly taking effect. He finally decided to open his eyes and look up to see if the girl was still there, only to find that she was still sitting in the exact same position she was in before. He sighed in annoyance. "Would you just look at me for a second?" He finally asked.

"No." With that, she reached out for him. He was about to say something when he realized he couldn't actually feel her hand, which was now gripping his wrist. It was like she wasn't even there. _Because she isn't. She's a figment of your fucking imagination!_ "You need to get your ass back in that bed," she added, pointing towards his bedroom. She let go of him in order to start walking to his room.

"You know, I'm really starting to think that you're some kind of horrific faceless ghost haunting me for whatever reason and that's why I can't ever see your face. Or is your face just that ugly?" Sean challenged, trying to trick her into turning around.

"I'm not the ghost here, Mr. I couldn't even remember my own name," she retorted, ignoring his comment about her being ugly.

"How do you know that?" Griffin asked defensively. Has she been following him? _Of course she's following you, stupid! She's everywhere you go!_

"Because otherwise, maybe you might actually be able to tell me who I am."

Confusion clouded his eyes, unsure of how to respond to that. Instead, he went back to his earlier comment. "Then show me your face."

"I can't. You won't let me." _This girl seriously likes talking in code. _

_ Baggage! Abort! Abort!_

_ Shut up!_

"What? What the hell does that even mean?"

_ Oh come on. I__'m just trying to have some fun._

_ This is your idea of fun?_

_ Not really. I just think this girl comes with some serious baggage. Better to stay away from her._

_ I can__'t! You said so yourself: She's EVERYWHERE!_

"I don't know. It's your mind."

"Then why are **you** in it?!" He snapped. "Why can't you just go away?"

"You're really asking the wrong person. You're the one that put me here," she stated with a little laugh.

_Wow. She has a cute laugh._

_ Dude, she__'s laughing __at__ you._

_ Oh__… Well that means she's laughing at you, too!_

_ I__'m not the one running my mouth like an idiot._

"But… Why?!" This whole situation was getting ridiculously frustrating.

"Beats me," she said. "I'm just someone you can't remember, stuck in your head every second of the day." _Wait a minute… That's it! _

"I knew it! They aren't just hallucinations! They're memories, aren't they?" His head started pounding as realization hit him. He knew what was coming next, but he tried to fight it.

_I'm not crazy!_

_ Congratulations._

"I'm not crazy!" He shouted, laughing hysterically. He jumped up, standing on the couch with his arms raised over his head, repeating his words. "I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy! I'm not—" Crash.

Before he could finish, he fell forward off the couch, barely missing the edge of the glass coffee table as the headache over powered him once again, and he sunk to his knees. _I bet the neighbours would beg to differ. There's a crazy man talking to himself up in 824! Get help! Ahhh!_

"Ahhh!" He shouted, the pain finally washing over him. He stayed down, going into the fetal position, waiting for the pain to go away.

"I think you should get some rest," he heard her say, and he felt a slight push on his chest. When he opened his eyes, he could see her, leaning over him, with a hand on his shoulder. If only he wasn't seeing blurry doubles of everything around him, he would be able to see her face right now. _Dammit! No!_ He used all the energy he could muster up to try to bring her face into focus, but with no luck.

"I'm fine, really," he protested, as she grabbed onto his arm, trying to lift him off of the floor. The fact that she was moving so much around him definitely wasn't helping ease the dizziness and return his vision to normal.

"No, you're not fine," she argued.

_Come on, listen to the lady, buddy. You need your rest. Let's go… Come on…_

"Geez," she groaned. His weight was much too heavy for her small body to hold him up alone. Griffin finally forced himself to stand up and wrapped one arm around her shoulder to keep himself steady, deciding it was probably better to try and help her.

"Alright big guy. Magic carpet ride." The voice that was once in his head, was now coming from beside him, also trying to hold him up. He looked over at both of them in confusion, but continued moving towards the couch, desperately wanting to sit down.

"Just let me help get Percy," he muttered, unsure of what he just said. He wasn't even sure if he actually said it, or if it was just the drugs playing more mind games on him. He couldn't think clearly. _Who the hell is Percy?_

"No," she told him, and he felt something sharp jab his right arm. He yelped in pain and looked over to see that she had just stabbed him with some sort of needle. He wanted to ask her what it was, but she quickly apologized before helping him lie down and covering him up with a blanket. "We'll be here when you wake up," she promised, and his eyes closed. Though he could still faintly hear them talking next to him:

_Everyone can see it, you know…_

"See what?"

_Everybody but you, apparently._

"I'm just helping him out."

_Mhm…_

"You know, maybe you should cut down on those energy drinks, just sayin'." He could hear the smile in her voice, and he promptly fell asleep, picturing it in his mind.

She had lied to him. She wasn't there when he woke up the next morning, the couch soaked in his sweat, and the blanket thrown on the floor. In fact, that night was the last time he ever saw or dreamt about her. _Natasha was right. The hallucinations went away. _And he missed her. So he decided to stop using those pills, in the hopes that she would somehow come back to him. But she never did.

And a month later, when his father accused him of using, he didn't have to lie. Because he really was clean. Every time he got tempted, he thought about her. Months passed without a single sign of the brunette that had somehow occupied so much of his mind. And slowly, over time, he forgot all about her.

**A/N: Phew! Long chapter! So hopefully that makes up for 3 months worth of no updates… I added that little Alex POV that Tori asked for. So… What'd you think? Did you see Birkhoff coming? And the inner monologue bickering.. That was oodles of fun to write. So come on, reviews are motivation to continue and bring Salex together faster ;) And apartment 824? Amanda is one ****ironic little bitch, am I right?**


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